Self Sabotage: How to Overcome?

Look at the haunting eyes of an artists tormented with frustration.

Sabotage of self = frustrations out-of-control.

Biographers say van Gogh was mentally ill when in a fit of rage, he pursued his friend, Gauguin, with an open razor, and finally, subdued by his friend, ended up cutting a portion of his own ear lobe off. Some say it was a fit of epilepsy but that was clearly a conscious act. I agree, the artist was out-of-control mentally but what caused it?

Frustrations. His quest "to comprehend the spiritual essence of man and nature" and project it upon canvas in a new way bucking conventional wisdom literally frustrated him to death. His inability to deal with his passions and frustrations ... wasn't that one of his root problems? Not long after that incident, depressed and despondent, van Gogh did finally take his life. Suicide is the final sabotage of self.

Van Gogh's artistic temperament had gone out-of-control leading him to this desperate act "for the good of all" his suicide note read. No one was there to help or encourage him for he was forging art in a direction that had never been taken. His inner demon of frustration cut his life short, yet his work is admired and treasured today.

Regular people will never understand the struggle-taking place in an artist. Yet, every artist needs some encouragement. They need to learn how to deal with their ever-present frustration.

Great artists of the past sabotage themselves less drastically. Out of frustration, paintings were painted over and started afresh, or even destroyed. (I wonder how much great art was lost because of a fit of frustration; how much art is lost today?) Unable to get past creative blocks, many artists’ productivity diminishes.

How to overcome frustration?

Keep working to improve skills, and don't expect anyone other than another artist to truly understand your drive. Learning to cope is just as much a growth process as learning to draw, to develop compositions, or mix colors.

The world will never understand the artist. Recognition of this is important. This is what I have learned:
• Learn to ask for help from the right persons.
• Learn to ignore unworthy criticism.
• Remain teachable.
• Ignore those who criticize your explosive temperament.
• Do not destroy your work for at least a day or two.
• Do not remain blocked.
• (Most important) trust God completely and accept your inadequacy.

"What is so blasted important?" the world asks, "It's just a pretty picture hanging on the wall. If it improves the space it occupies, that's good enough. Why all the agony and frustration over a pretty little picture?"

Artistic temperament doesn't make sense to regular people who stand in puzzlement when they encounter the extreme passions and frustrations that boil inside an artist. Art is a furious passion. Insecure egos are placed on the line and easily crushed by criticism, or blown out of proportion by praise. It is like a roller-coaster ride for most artists until they reach a point where their skills are sufficient and finally the ego is stabilized. Finally self-confidence destroys much of the frustration associated with creating and completing art but it takes a very long time to get to that point (I am finding).

No artist can explain that passion to create for we don't understand it ourselves. (Right?) It is an obsessive drive. We are creators. To an artist looking at the complacency of the world it is bewildering. We wonder why anyone would want to exist without great passions ... even with all the turmoil ... it is better to live a short life that is full of passion rather than a long boring passion-less one.

Artists get frustrated; it's their temperament. Don't expect the world to understand; don't expect the artist to understand the world.