Stress . . . on a personal note.

The culprit is stress; the very thing I strive to release as the quote on my web masthead admonishes.  "if there is anything lovely, think on these things" to be at peace.  Obviously, I have not won this inner struggle to enter into the Lord's 'rest' yet. 

It started in 2009 just before leaving for my first art boot camp in Haverhill, MA.  A severe pain struck my jaw like a sledgehammer.  Stabbing pain just to the side of my chin.  I cried out in utter agony.  I thought it was a bad tooth needing a root canal or pulled.  My dentist said, "no, there is nothing wrong with your teeth."  He then went on to tell me about a medical condition, an incurable medical condition known as trigeminal neuralgia and how many patients demand to have all their teeth pulled but without relief.  "You should see a neurologist." And I did who said it might be or it might be something else.  To stop the attacks, started treatment as both.  The medicines worked and it stopped for a while.  I just assumed it was trigeminal neuralgia.

The trigeminal nerve (running - branching on both sides of the face), the nerve that gives us our sense of taste, smell, ability to smile, etc.  This nerve becomes irritated and fires excruciating stabbing pain lasting a few seconds to minutes or more.  When the attacks come, one can't speak, can't eat, can't brush teeth, or touch the face for it triggers more attacks that are unbearable.  It's often called the suicide syndrome.

To make a long story short, after seven months treating my attacks, a new confirmed diagnosis was made two weeks ago ruling out trigeminal neuralgia; what I am suffering with is called a nemmular migraine variant syndrome.  It's brought on by severe stress.  For example, I had an attacks just before going to each of the three art boot camps.  It went away for a year and half but came back after my mother's death as I began to assume my duties as trustee of her estate and managing partner of our family partnership oil and gas business.  My neurologist changed my medicines completely and finally after a week, the pain attacks have stopped.  That was a week ago Monday.

What I have learned: I'm not walking in the truth that I embrace or I would not be so affected by stress. 
 

Lord give me your faith to completely release this or any other stress when I am tempted to worry or fret about life's duties and stresses.  Give me strength, insight and forgive me for the sin of worry for clearly I am not trusting in You.  Increase my faith.  Thank you Father for your Word, a rhema verse and the assurance to wait upon you and to take courage.  Thank you for healing me and bless Dr. Gordan for being a channel of healing to me. -- Amen

Psalm 27...the whole chapter.