Welcome 2009

Ring Out, Wild Bells
from In Memoriam A.H.H.
by Alfred, Lord Tennyson (1849)

Ring out, wild bells, to the wild sky,
The flying cloud, the frosty light;
The year is dying in the night;
Ring out, wild bells, and let him die.

Ring out the old, ring in the new,
Ring, happy bells, across the snow:
The year is going, let him go;
Ring out the false, ring in the true.

Ring out the grief that saps the mind,
For those that here we see no more,
Ring out the feud of rich and poor,
Ring in redress to all mankind.

Ring out a slowly dying cause,
And ancient forms of party strife;
Ring in the nobler modes of life,
With sweeter manners, purer laws.

Ring out the want, the care the sin,
The faithless coldness of the times;
Ring out, ring out my mournful rhymes,
But ring the fuller minstrel in.

Ring out false pride in place and blood,
The civic slander and the spite;
Ring in the love of truth and right,
Ring in the common love of good.

Ring out old shapes of foul disease,
Ring out the narrowing lust of gold;
Ring out the thousand wars of old,
Ring in the thousand years of peace.

Ring in the valiant man and free,
The larger heart, the kindlier hand;
Ring out the darkness of the land,
Ring in the Christ that is to be.

Poll Results

Should I trash this painting?
Edges...aaaaaaaaaaargh. I am wanting to trash it.

Only two people took the poll and both were for keeping it. I guess is two people on the planet thinks it's worth keeping...I'll keep it...for now.

New Year Art Resolutions - 2009

1. To first straighten up my studio and make it more conducive to creating art.
2. To prep canvases with rabbit skin glue which I have been putting off.
3. To work with more consistency and thus be more productive each week.
4. To learn how to paint a painting in one hour.
5. To take a life drawing class in January.
   
6. To produce 20 finished pieces of art this year: 7 still life paintings, 7 landscapes, 6 portraits/figures.
7. To stop being so critical of myself; to pray for divine artistic inspiration; to trust that my best effort is good enough for me and the Lord.
   

Resolutions are nothing more than goal setting. Without goals, little can be accomplished. To accomplish this goal in 52 weeks I would have to complete 1 painting every 2.5 weeks. When you look at it in that way, it does not seem so impossible.

The Coming Reign of Jesus...

***
" For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given:
and the government shall be upon his shoulder:
and his name shall be called
Wonderful, Counsellor,
The mighty God,
The everlasting Father,
The Prince of Peace."

Jesus is that prophesied child.
He was rejected by his own...
His Jewish brethren for
our sakes.

"Of the increase of [his] government
and
peace [there shall be] no end,
upon the throne of David,
and upon his kingdom, to order it,
and to establish it with judgment
and
with justice from henceforth even for ever."

The zeal of the LORD of hosts
will perform this.
--Isaiah's prophecy Chapter 9:6-7

***
May Jesus come soon to establish His government
upon this earth at last.

Consider that during the time that Jesus walked
upon this earth He never had the government
"upon his shoulders."

This is a prophecy yet to be fulfilled and He is
the Messiah that every Jew has been looking for; this special people
whose eyes have been blinded for a short time
for our sake ... so that the Gentile Church may be brought into
the Kingdom of God...that "twig" grafted into the olive tree...
and
In that latter day Jesus will indeed place the government
upon His shoulders, then every Jewish eye and every Jewish ear will
at last be opened to reveal Jesus the Messiah who is and
has always been their Messiah and ours.

Jesus may come very soon now because
what was prophesied concerning
His second coming to earth
has almost been completely fulfilled.

"And when these things begin to come to pass,
then look up,
and lift up your heads;
for your redemption draweth nigh."
Gospel of Luke 21:28

Seeing....

Why can't I "see" in works of art what other artists see? (i.e. artists whom I respect very much) Other very skilled artists see so readily fantastic things ... in modern art? Yet, I can't "see" what they see. Why is that?

Often I am tempted to wonder ... whether this is truthfulness or a bias issue. Then I think .... no ... they must be "seeing" something that I am still not trained to see...I guess. Now I am no novice. I have been trying to "see" this in modern contemporary art for 30 years. Read books tell I'm cross-eyed and so bored I'm nearly brain dead. Goobbly-goop.

I just don't get the fascination with the 2 dimension surface...the canvas surface. Haven't we explored that enough? Where is the interest that grips the viewer in this abstract "power art" that is suppose to be "telling" some sort of "story" in a "powerful" way .

Do you have to have a PhD to understand it this stuff...is it snobbery or an invention of taste that blinds the eye?

Well some of this art is not saying anything to me ... but I defer to the experts. I guess I do not have the intelligence to be a "great" artist in their eyes.

But, why then is it that I can in fact "see" dynamism in J.M.W. Turner's landscapes/seascapes especially his later works? Powerful, big, dynamic paintings.

While one artist is berated for being "dull" with no variety of strokes, and labeled a method painter, unimaginative ... another painter is praised for being brilliant with BORING shapes ... yet I don't see a variety of strokes in their paintings either ... nor do I see anything so dynamic that my interest is held more than a few seconds?

Aaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrggg

Maybe it is my monitor or a need for new glasses.

THIS is why I became a graphic artists in the 1967 and not a fine artist. I was NOT fascinated with abstract expressionism and it was do or die then.

December Life Drawing

Frustrations of Struggling Artist...
It is no wonder that I cannot get much done. Constant interruptions and family duties call me away from productive painting sessions in my studio. Then when I have a day or two, I am still so distracted that my sessions produce nothing worth keeping. In frustration I usually start tearing up my work. In fact, I have made the mistake of trying to take unfinished works only to end up destroying them. Everything ends in the trash can.

Painting for me requires me to be in the right frame of mind (I think). I have tried so many times to just push through a bad session but ultimately I'm driven to quit and walkout fiercely frustrated. Then that fear makes it hard to enter the studio again.

Thankfully, this life drawing session is saving the day for me. With absolutely no planning, no expectations, I just go and do it. If something good happens fine but if not, it doesn't matter. Now it's the holidays...forget doing anything serious for me.

December Life Drawing...


This is from December Life Drawing ... I wish I could get better images. These are somewhat overly contrasted next to the originals.

November Painting After Renoir

The above is a painting...a copy I made of the famous child's portrait by Renoir. I was hoping to learn something of the brushwork by painting after Renoir which was indeed informative as was the coloration. It needs some tweaking but I am pretty happy with it so far, and also what I have learned.

The portrait is entitled Mademoiselle Legard (painted after) Pierre-Auguste Renoir
(Original is at Philadelphia Museum of Art)

November Life Drawings

These are the current life drawings for November.

Success Found in Failure

Lately I have been experiencing a lot of failures.

The words that I spoke to my children to encourage them are ringing in my ears now. "It's the failures in your life that breeds success. How you handle failure is far more important than how you handle successes. You cannot grow spiritually without failures."

That is so true. It is the failures that build character and strength.

But, when it is your failure, well that is another thing. Never teach someone something that you are not ready to experience yourself. I guess you think that failure will end but it never does.

Last year I decided to learn a very difficult (over 10 page) piano piece -- Carl Von Weber's famous Perpetual Motion -- to be performed at the Ladies Music Club, Pianist Division meeting, some of the best pianists in the city. I practiced that piece which is performed at blistering speed so much, that I memorized it. The day came to perform it. I got there early and played it thought almost to perfection.

When I performed it, I got to the second page and totally went blank. So flustered was I that I could not go on. I was crushed, humiliated, defeated, and in tears. Self sabotage thoughts ran through my mind, "it doesn't matter how hard you practice, you will always fail."

For about six months I could not touch the piano. It literally made me anxious to think about. I thought of resigning from the club and wondered if I would ever want to play again ever. Over reaction? I guess some could say so but for me the whole point of joining the club was to overcome my fear of performing and improve my playing. I wanted to play with confidence and now I am feeling completely shattered.

Recently, I thought of those words I spoke to my children. Hypocrite, practice what you preach. I went to the piano with some anxiety and begain playing that very piece. It was full of mistakes but I was beginning to not take myself so seriously. "Oh that is really bad but I guess it can only get better." Right then, I decided that I would not resign the club, and I would play again. Next time I will pick a less ambitious piece but I will not let any poor performance totally defeat me. With my ego adjusted, I will take myself less seriously, and in the end I will play and perform with greater confidence and I will have to work even harder at it and sooner or later I will again be successful at the keyboard.

The same is true with my art. Sometimes criticisms are helpful; sometimes they are destructive and discouraging. It is, after all, someone's subjective opinions. In the end it is I who will have to be the final judge. As I work, I will gain self confidence and improve. Don't we all want the approval of mankind yet, that in itself can be very destructive to creativity. Once again my ego is well adjusted and in the end I will finally produce art that I can be proud of. If I can please myself, that should be enough for I would have done the very best that I can do.

The sketches I posted are from a life drawing session. There is great joy in just fulfilling the process of making art. Success and that little elusive red dot "sold" only serves to augment that present joy but if that is all one lives for, that monster can never be satisfied.

So it is in the valley of despair that we grow. Joy comes in the morning.

October Art In Progress

This is the most recent version of a painting I am working on and I see that it stinks. I think I will just start over. The skin tones are not that blue-ish. The first version had lots of vitality but then I over thought it...now I am trying to recover but it still does not have the punch that I want.

What I love about this image (see reference) is that it tells a story. I want to do justice to this young very handsome black man. His body is perfection, but his life is not ... and his face is full of defiance and his body full of tension. The white paint does not mask the struggle of a person moving begrudgingly toward changes in thinking. It is about influences, tensions, and it is wrapped in an absurd situation that uses fun and silliness to drive home a serious life changing point. This is a summer high school age Christian camp. Thankfully, this young man was won over by a group of caring kids and leaders who just simply loved him unconditionally. The first thing they do is teach each kid not to take himself seriously...and the reason for the goofy face painting...it worked